{"id":11300,"date":"2012-07-03T13:24:23","date_gmt":"2012-07-03T13:24:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/?p=11300"},"modified":"2018-01-31T12:04:24","modified_gmt":"2018-01-31T12:04:24","slug":"chats-from-the-chair-patient-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/culture\/chats-from-the-chair-patient-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Chats from the chair – Patient #2"},"content":{"rendered":"

Chloe is writing notes when a \u00a0strange shifty looking little man walks in.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: I\u2019m not here.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: Who said that.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: don\u2019t be funny, I\u2019m just saying, if anyone asks \u2013 you haven\u2019t seen me.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: No, seriously, I can\u2019t see you.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: Down here.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: Oh yes. There you are.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: No I\u2019m not \u2013 I\u2019m not here.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: Its normal to feel a reluctance …<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: No I mean \u2013 I\u2019m not supposed to be here \u2013 so I\u2019m not. Got it? Good. Anyway, I\u2019m not\u00a0 here for me, I\u2019m here for a friend. I speak for them.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: You have a friend? Is he invisible? Do you hear voices?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: Can I sit.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: of course, would you like me to give you hand onto the chair. I can get a stool.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: are you being funny.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: you think people don\u2019t take you seriously.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: Lots of people don\u2019t! Ignorant people \u2013 they\u2019re all jealous. They haven\u2019t been chosen. Even my wife was jealous. She left in the end, said I was taking things too far. Idiot. She\u2019s doomed now. Doomed …<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: You\u2019re going to harm you\u2019re wife? I have to tell you that I\u2019m duty bound …<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: you can\u2019t tell me anything!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: ah, you like to be in control.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: Not like! I am <\/em>in control. I paid millions to be where I am and now people have to notice me. I\u2019m in control of loads now.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: Sometimes a need for control indicates a distinct lack of….<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: You\u2019re beneath me.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: actually, when we both stand up you\u2019re beneath me. Quite a few inches below.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: Look, the fact is, I\u2019m special. I\u2019m chosen, why won\u2019t people just accept it. I have to jump and down on sofas and criticise people who take anti-depressants and still people don\u2019t listen. They think I\u2019m delusional. I\u2019m not. I\u2019m special.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: well, your wife didn\u2019t think you were special. Why do you think…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: I. AM. SPECIAL.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: You don\u2019t really believe that do you? That\u2019s why you\u2019ve given away ridiculous amounts of money to an alien isn\u2019t it. To make you feel special.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: I\u2019m going. This is beneath me. I haven\u2019t paid millions of pounds to be judged by ..<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: … Mr Cruise.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Little Man<\/strong>: What?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chloe<\/strong>: Would you like me to reach the door handle for you?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Chloe is writing notes when a \u00a0strange shifty looking little man walks in.   Little Man: I\u2019m not here.   Chloe: Who said that.   Little Man: don\u2019t be funny, I\u2019m just saying, if anyone asks \u2013 you haven\u2019t seen me.   Chloe: No, seriously, I can\u2019t see you.     Little Man: Down here. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":35,"featured_media":11305,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4159],"tags":[2891],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11300"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/35"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11300"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11300\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11320,"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11300\/revisions\/11320"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/11305"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11300"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11300"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thelondonlook.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11300"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}